Conversation The use of words
Please also see: ‘Christian Behaviour.’ ‘Decrees.’
Seek the Truth with all your heart.
Jesus is our model and perfect example of behaviour. He was (and still is) perfectly genuine and inoffensive in every way, and that is how every Christian person should be.
Every word spoken and every action, even if spontaneous, should be influenced by a continually and constantly developed awareness of being led by the Holy Spirit, with Jesus as our example and guide, and GOD as a constant witness to our every word and conversation.
The things we say & the words we use can have everlasting effect. The power of the tongue can make or break, with an indelible result. Words are far more powerful and influential on both the speaker, and the hearer, than most people have any idea of. Your life is vulnerable to the words you use, and to the words others use towards you.
Be aware that every word you use can be either a blessing or a curse, can lift someone up or put them down. Every conversation can be either like giving a bunch of flowers or throwing stones, or anywhere in between.
Words are spiritual containers, they release spiritual power, and sometimes hurtful force; so choose words carefully before you release them. Choose words that release love, positivity, encouragement, and sincerity; not the opposites. Diplomacy, encouragement, and kind words, are medicine to the soul. The words we use can indicate who and what we are and what we stand for, our principles, standards, morals, convictions, and loyalties. Our words can reveal our character.
Conversation should not be corrupt, tasteless, immoral, offensive, hurtful, undiplomatic, insensitive, or breaking confidentialities. Everything we say should be of integrity, and dignity, should build people up, add quality to life, and not tear people down, offend, or hurt anyone. This might be difficult at certain times, but we must exercise self-control, and stay on the considerate and safe side of the fence, virtually irrespective of who we are talking with, and the mode of the conversation.
Pause before responding to people or situations, giving GOD’s Holy Spirit time to act through you. Avoid hasty words and actions.
A Christian must be genuine and sincere at all times, and should avoid any hint of facetiousness and sarcasm.
The tongue should be an instrument of blessing, even when one is frustrated, annoyed, offended, and even angry, irrespective of the situation, whether in business, disciplining children, talking with family or friends, when confronted by an angry or argumentative person, or whatever. Decency and dignity are always better than offensiveness, aggressiveness, conflict, or confrontation; and almost without exception will ‘pour oil on troubled waters.’ Be a ‘blesser,’ not a ‘curser.’ Do not use swear words.
Encouragement = exhortation, expands people’s confidence and self esteem, it builds them up. Criticism can shrink a person and cause them to withdraw. So always speak on the positive - encouraging side of the ledger. It is easy to find ways of speaking in terms of positivity, and not focussing on the negativity of a subject, so think in terms of encouragement. Lift-up, don’t put-down. See yourself being and speaking as GOD wants you to, through the influence of the Holy Spirit; instead of a worldly-conditioned, unsaved, unchanged, ‘sinful’ person.
Some things that are spoken could be contradicting the Word of GOD, and therefore neutralizing GOD’s words of blessing, healing, encouragement, and direction.
Ephesians 4:29-32 ‘Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of GOD, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling, and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ GOD forgave you.’
Avoid entertainment and media that contain unrighteous language, unrighteous images, and any unrighteousness in general.
What we say and how we say it has a strong influence on our own life. We should always speak in the positive, because our subconscious mind picks up the subject that we speak about, not the details of what we say. The words we use and the things we say, especially those that we repeat often, become the silent navigators of our life. Even if we think our thinking and mind’s belief system dominates; it is silently being steered by our subconsciousness, and repetition of certain words which eventually dominate.
Change your world by changing your words. Always use words that create a positive magnetism in your life. The power of words is far greater than most people imagine.
Speaking words audibly will more effectively embed them into your consciousness and into reality. Speak the Word of GOD into your life. Words spoken by you have more effect on you, and your body, than anyone else’s words.
GOD spoke everything in the universe into being; and your words can speak conditions and situations into being in your life.
Negative words attract negative magnetism which attracts more negativity. Then you will say “See I was right, this bad thing has happened again,” - maybe multiple times. Of course it has, your words attracted it. So avoid speaking negative repetition into your life. Don’t condemn yourself into inevitable negative outcomes.
The more you talk faith, the more faith you will have. The more you dwell on problems, discouragement, trials, and negative things, even just to get sympathy; the more of such things you will have. Why mourn over things you cannot now change. GOD is inviting us to open our souls to heavenly things, not earthly things, so that HE may flood our hearts with the glory of heaven.
Avoid using double negatives.
A negative referring to a negative, can only negate the negative. The literally correct meaning of all such wording means the exact opposite of what the person is trying to say.
Don’t use words - grammar - that contradict what you are trying to say.
‘We don’t have nothing,” literally means “We do have something.”
“It won’t do you no good,” literally means “It will do you good.”
“I can’t find no place to park,” should be “I cannot find a place to park.”
“They won’t allow no more inside,” should be “They won’t allow any more inside,”
“I don’t have nobody to help me,” should be “I don’t have anybody to help me.”
“It doesn’t hurt nobody,” should be “It doesn’t hurt anybody.”
“They don’t have no children,” literally means “They do have children. The statement should have been, “They don’t have children.”
Many songs contain double negatives which could easily be corrected with minimal adjustments, which I would find far more enjoyable to listen to.
Correcting such expressions just requires one to be aware, observant, and conscious of what one is saying.
Also on the subject of wrong grammar, there are so many words which people are expressing incorrectly by dropping off ‘ly;’ which is very bad grammar, for example:
“It was a real nice day,” should be: “It was a really nice day.”
“They were acting wise,” should be: “They were acting wisely.”
“They did it real quick,” should be: “They did it really quickly.”
“She did it beautiful,” should be: “She did it beautifully.”
Avoid saying such things as “I am set in my ways,” or “I am too old to change now.” Such words make you a prisoner of the statement, and the condition, which traps you within your self-created limitation, and inflexibility.
We should all think and speak in terms of being adaptable, and not lock ourselves away from flexibility. Being willing to be adaptable does not mean you always have to adapt to the other person’s ideas and suggestions; you always have a choice.
We should not speak in ‘ownership terms’ such as “I love my wine,” or “I am addicted to my cigarettes,” or “I love my food,” which tell your mind that they are an inseparable part of you. It is far better to say: “I love wine,” or “I am addicted to cigarettes,” or “I love food,” which at least places them at a manageable distance. Refer to things in your life in the ‘third person,’ as being separate from you, don’t let them own you.
Be in control of who you are and what you say.
Think of the scripture which speaks of 'Speaking things that be not as though they are.' So use words to speak things into existence, just as GOD does.
Romans 4:17 ‘---- the GOD WHO gives life to the dead and calls into being things that were not.’
This does not mean to lie, you are not denying that you have a problem, but speak in terms of having what you want, and not of what you don’t want, which is exercising prayerful faith.
Just as GOD says that whatever you pray for, believe that you have already received it.
Sometimes we need to give the reason for our Christian belief. This is called apologetics - an apologist is a person who offers an argument in defence of their belief - something that is usually controversial to the other person. The word comes from the Greek word ‘apologia’ meaning ‘speaking in defence.’
Mark 11:22-24 “Have faith in GOD,” Jesus answered. “I tell you the truth, if anyone says to this mountain, ‘Go throw yourself into the sea,’ and does not doubt in their heart but believes that what they say will happen, it will be done for them. Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.
Luke 17:5-6 ‘The apostles said to the Lord, “Increase our faith.” He replied, “If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mulberry tree, “Be uprooted and planted in the sea,’ and it will l obey you.”
So, by passing-on good news and positive thoughts, the ongoing process can be self- fulfilling without people even realizing the effect of words.
Positive thoughts and words attract more of the same. So from now on make a policy of passing on good news and positive words, while also allowing them to occupy your heart and mind.
Positivity is a rich organic fertilizer, and negativity is a poison. One lifts up, the other pulls down.
Words are seeds, they can initiate wanted or unwanted continuation. The words you speak to others, also have an effect on you. So whether you speak positively, negatively, or angrily, to others; the very energy in those words will also rebound and effect you. So think carefully about what you are saying, and the words you are using. Express positivity into other’s lives, instead of negativity.
Some people destroy one another, and even themselves, with words, and do not understand the power of what they are saying.
The word Abracadabra may derive from an Aramaic phrase meaning ‘I create as I speak,’ and in the Hebrew language, the phrase translates more accurately as, ‘It came to pass as it was spoken,’ meaning I can create as I speak, whatever I say can become reality. The power to create is in what you say, your words shape your life.
Avoid saying anything that later requires you to need to say something like: “I did not really mean it,” or, “I did not mean it the way it sounded,” or “I said it in good humour.”
The spirit of the words originally spoken continues to hover in people’s minds, memories, and sub-consciousness.
Avoid negative ‘humour’ especially about ageing, it is verbal food that can steer you in its own direction.
Avoid a spirit of contradiction. Avoid petty criticism, teasing, facetiousness, sarcasm, and negative ‘putting down’ type of ‘so-called humour.’ Negative humour is at someone else’s expense, and is not true humour anyway. If you think it is, and find it seriously funny, I suggest that you re-assess your sense of humour. Humour at someone else’s expense is not decent humour at all.
I cannot laugh at anything which is physically or psychologically injurious or offensive.
I’m sure Jesus didn’t.
Why waste words on unproductive or negative conversation.
Jesus only ever spoke meaningfully.
Always say things which build others up, encourage each other. Only ever say what you would be happy for others to say to you, or what you would say in GOD’s company. GOD hears and sees everything anyway, in fact HE knows what you are going to say before you even think or say it. Say things that add value - not things that are futile.
A Christian must think, speak, and act, in GOD-liness. A real Christian is a new creation, and should live like it. Be a light - not a faint glow.
Self-control is best; and together with a meek and quiet spirit which is like a balm, no one is hurt or offended, and there are no wounds to be healed from hastily spoken reactive words.
Speak words of faith, not of fear; words of blessing, not of cursing. Words that are supposed to be humorous at anyone else’s expense should not even raise a smile, because they are actually verbal poison.
May your conversation always be uplifting, re-affirming, encouraging, edifying, positive, and pleasing to GOD.
There is nothing more rewarding, satisfying, and encouraging as loving others through your words and actions. Such communication is very therapeutic to the speaker and the hearer.
Positivity, encouragement, and politeness, attract a similar reaction, or response, in conversation and behaviour. They attract the same as themselves; unlike magnetic forces, in which opposite polarities attract each other, and similar polarities repel. In this respect human psychology is the opposite to some scientific principles.
We should avoid all swear words, even words like ‘gee & gee whiz’, and ‘golly’ ‘gosh’ which are derived from the names of Jesus and GOD. ‘Crikey’ is derived from Christ. They may seem innocent enough, but when one knows their origin, and one aims to ‘be perfect as GOD is perfect,’ our re-born heart and mind leads us to avoid them and seek purity in every way possible. We should also avoid saying ‘Oh my GOD.!’ When we belong to GOD we no longer want to be of this world; we are in this world, but we now belong to GOD’S eternal kingdom and that is where our focus is.
We should avoid saying “to be honest …,” which implies that everything else we have said is not honest. Sometimes people say: “To be perfectly honest with you …,” which is also best avoided altogether, it poses the question of what is the difference between being honest and perfectly honest? Honesty is honesty!
Words such as “I don’t mean to be nasty or hurtful, but …,” are usually followed by words that are better not said at all.
It is better to avoid using hyperboles such as “It was amazing.” What word do we then use to describe something which really is (literally) amazing? It is better to use a word which is accurate rather than exaggerating or distorting.
It is far better to avoid arguing or getting upset; stay perfectly calm, stay silent, and maybe just walk away.
Words spoken cannot be taken back; they continue echoing – reverberating – in others minds long after they have been spoken. They can be very hurtful, or contain a suggestion or thought which it would have been much better to have left unspoken. Your words may have been a spontaneous response or reaction; but even if you try to retract such words, it might help, but they have already revealed your thoughts and feelings, and have already registered in hearers minds.
Words can be like a knife, a bullet, or even a mini bomb; but they can also be like healing balm, or even convey deep, rich, meaningful love. They can create pictures of beauty or ugliness. They can reveal what is in one’s heart.
Some people say that words can never hurt me, but like most people when they are lying in bed in the quietness of the night; those words, even from days ago, suddenly return to their minds, and echo over and over.
The Bible says that we should be gracious in everything we say. Conversation should always try to bring out the best in others, not denigrate them or cut them off.
Words are the vehicle through which thoughts are conveyed. Good communication makes clear your personal boundaries, beliefs, values, and desires. Sometimes healthy relationships call for healthy confrontation.
So rather than make a mess of things, pray: “Lord, give me words of wisdom; help me say the right things, in the right way, at the right time.” The Holy Spirit will guide you, instruct you, and follow through with you, so you get it right, until you can say:
Proverbs 8:6-9 ‘Listen, for I have trustworthy things to say; I open my lips to speak what is right. My mouth speaks what is true, for my lips detest wickedness. All the words of my mouth are just; none of them is crooked or perverse. To the discerning, all of them are right; they are upright to those who have found knowledge.’
Proverbs 21:19 ‘Better to live in a desert than with a quarrelsome and nagging wife.’
A commitment to GOD is a serious thing, which must be respected. The following scriptures highlight the necessity to be of integrity in everything.
Exodus 20:7 ‘You shall not misuse the Name of the LORD your GOD, for the LORD will not hold anyone guiltless who misuses HIS Name.’
Which of course means to not use ‘GOD or Jesus’ as a swear word in any way at all.
Exodus 20:16 ‘You shall not give false testimony against your neighbour.’ This means to not lie to anyone. ‘Neighbour’ means other people, anyone and everyone living on this planet is a neighbour, just as you are.
Deuteronomy 23:21-23 ‘If you make a vow to the LORD your GOD, do not be slow to pay it (honour it, carry it out,) for the LORD your GOD will certainly demand it of you and you will be guilty of sin. But if you refrain from making a vow, you will not be guilty. Whatever your lips utter you must be sure to do, because you made your vow freely to the LORD you GOD with your own mouth.’
Psalm 5:1-2 ‘Give ear to my words, O LORD, consider my sighing. Listen to my cry for help, my King and my GOD, for I pray to You.’
Psalm 19:14 ‘May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in Your sight, O LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer.’
Psalm 34:12-14 ‘Whoever of you loves life and desires to see many good days, keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking lies. Turn from evil and do good; seek peace and pursue it.’
Psalm 39:1 ‘I said, “I will watch my ways and keep my tongue from sin; I will put a muzzle on my mouth as long as the wicked are in my presence.”
Psalm 49:3 ‘My mouth will speak words of wisdom; the utterance from my heart will give understanding.’
Psalm 141:3 ‘Set a guard over my mouth LORD; keep watch over the door of my lips.’
Proverbs 2:11 ‘Discretion will protect you, and understanding will guard you.’
Proverbs 4:20-27 ‘My son pay attention to what I say; turn your ear to my words. Do not let them out of your sight, keep them within your heart; for they are life to those who find them and health to one’s whole body. Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. Keep your mouth free of perversity; keep corrupt talk far from your lips. Let your eyes look straight ahead; fix you gaze directly before you. Give careful thought to the paths for your feet and be steadfast in all your ways. Do not turn to the right or the left; keep your foot from evil.’
Proverbs 6:2-3 ‘If you have been trapped by what you said, ensnared by the words of your mouth, then do this, MY child, to free yourself, since you have fallen into your neighbours hands: Go humble yourself, press your plea with your neighbour.’
Proverbs 8:6-9 ‘Listen, for I have worthy things to say; I open my lips to speak what is right. My mouth speaks what is true, for my lips detest wickedness. All the words of my mouth are just; none of them is crooked or perverse. To the discerning all of them are right; they are faultless to those who have knowledge.’
Proverbs 10:11-14 ‘The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life, but violence overwhelms the mouth of the wicked. Hatred stirs up dissension, but love covers over all wrongs. Wisdom is found on the lips of the discerning, but a rod is for the back of whoever lacks judgement. Wise people store up knowledge, but the mouth of a fool invites ruin.
18-21 ‘Whoever conceals their hatred has lying lips, and whoever spreads slander is a fool. spreads slander is a fool. When words are many, sin is not absent, but whoever holds their tongue is wise. The tongue of the righteous is choice silver, but the heart of the wicked is of little value. The lips of the righteous nourish many, but fools die for lack of judgement.’ 31-32 ‘The mouth of the righteous bring forth wisdom, but a perverse tongue will be cut out . The lips of the righteous know what is fitting, but the mouth of the wicked only what is perverse.’
Proverbs 11:13 ‘A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy person keeps a secret.’
Proverbs 12:15 ‘The way of fools seems right to them, but the wise listen to advice.’
Proverbs 12:17-19 ‘A truthful witness gives honest testimony, but a false witness tells lies. Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. Truthful lips endure forever, but a lying tongue lasts only a moment.’
Proverbs 12:22-23 ‘”The LORD detests lying lips, but He delights in people who are truthful. A prudent person keeps their knowledge to themselves, but the heart of a fool blurts out folly.’
Proverbs 12:25 ‘An anxious heart weighs a person down, but a kind word cheers them up.’
Proverbs13:2-3 ‘From the fruit of their lips people enjoy good things, but the unfaithful have an appetite for violence. Whoever guards their lips guards their life, but whoever speaks rashly will come to ruin.’
Proverbs 15:1-4 ‘A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.’ ‘The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouth of the fool gushes folly.’ ‘The eyes of the LORD are everywhere, keeping watch on the wicked and the good.’ ‘The soothing tongue is a tree of life, but a perverse (deceitful) tongue crushes the spirit.’
Proverbs 15:7 ‘The lips of the wise spread knowledge, but the hearts of fools are not upright.’
Proverbs 15:28 ‘The heart of the righteous weighs its answers, but the mouth of the wicked gushes evil.’
Proverbs 16:24-25 ‘Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones. There is a way that appears to be right, but in the end it leads to death.’
Proverbs 17:9 ‘Whoever covers over an offence promotes love, but whoever repeats (harps on about) the matter separates even close friends.’
Proverbs 17:27-28 ‘The one who has knowledge uses words with restraint, and whoever has understanding is even tempered.’ ‘Even fools are thought wise if they keep silent, and discerning if they hold their tongues.’
Proverbs 18:4, 7, 13, & 20-21 ‘The words of the mouth are deep waters, but the fountain of wisdom is a rushing stream.’
‘A fool’s mouth is their undoing, and their lips are a snare to their soul.’ ‘To answer before listening, that is folly and shame.’ ‘From the fruit of their mouth a person’s stomach is filled; with the harvest of their lips they are satisfied.’
‘The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.’ (Meaning that you will reap the consequences of what you say.)
Proverbs 20:15 ‘Gold there is, and rubies in abundance, but lips that speak knowledge are a rare jewel.’
Proverbs 20:19 ‘A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid a person who talks too much.’
Proverbs 21:9 ‘Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.’
Proverbs 21:23 ‘Those who guard their mouths and their tongues keep themselves from calamity.’
Proverbs 25:11 ‘A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.’
Proverbs 26:5 ‘Answer a fool according to his folly, or he will be wise in his own eyes.’
Proverbs 26:12 ‘Do you see a person wise in their own eyes? There is more hope for a fool than for them.’
Proverbs 27:2 ‘Let another praise you, and not your own mouth; someone else, and not your own lips.’
Proverbs 29:9 ‘If a wise person goes to court with a fool, the fool rages and scoffs, and there is no peace.’
Proverbs 29:11 ‘Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end.’
Ecclesiastes 7:9 ‘Do not be quickly provoked in your spirit, for anger resides in the lap of fools.’
Ecclesiastes 10:12 ‘Words from the mouth of the wise are gracious, but fools are consumed by their own lips.’
Ecclesiastes 7:10 ‘Do not say, “Why were the old days better than these.?” For it is not wise to ask such questions.’
Ecclesiastes 10:4 ‘If a ruler’s anger rises against you, do not leave your post; calmness can lay great errors to rest.’
Isaiah 5:20-21 ‘Woe to those who call evil good and good evil, who put darkness for light and light for darkness, who put bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter.’ Woe to those who are wise in their own eyes and clever in their own sight.’
Matthew 15:10-11 ‘Jesus called the crowd to Him and said, “Listen and understand, What goes into a person’s mouth does not make them ‘unclean,’ but what comes out of their mouth, that is what makes them unclean.”
Matthew 15:18 ‘The things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and these defile them - make a person ‘unclean.’ For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander.’
Matthew 12:34b-37 ‘Out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks. The good person brings good things out of the good stored up in them, and the evil person brings evil things out of the evil stored up in them. But I tell you that people will have to give account on the day of judgement for every careless word they have spoken. For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.’
Mark 11:22-23 “Have faith in GOD,” Jesus answered. “I tell you the truth, if anyone says to this mountain ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and does not doubt in their heart but believes that what they say will happen, it will be done for them.” (‘Mountain’ represents whatever the problem is that you need to deal with, or the thing you want to achieve. All dependent, of course, on GOD’s approval.)
Luke 12:2-3 ‘There is nothing concealed that will not be disclosed, or hidden that will not be made known. What you have said in the dark will be heard in the daylight, and what you have whispered in the ear in the inner rooms will be proclaimed from the roofs.’
John 6:63b ‘Jesus said “The words I have spoken to you are spirit and life.”
Ephesians 5:19-21 ‘Speak to one another with psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to GOD the FATHER for everything, in the Name of our Lord Jesus Christ. Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.’
Ephesians 6:19 ‘Pray also for me, that whenever I open my mouth, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel.’
Colossians 2:8 ‘See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the elemental spiritual forces of this world rather than on Christ.’
Colossians 4:6 ‘Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.’
James 1:19-20 ‘My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that GOD desires.’
James 1:26 ‘If anyone considers themselves religious and yet does not keep a tight rein on their tongue, they deceive themselves and their religion is worthless.’
James 3:4-12 ‘Take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. Like-wise the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of their life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell. All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles, and creatures of the sea are being tamed and have been tamed by people, but no one can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.
With the tongue we praise our LORD and FATHER; and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in GOD’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be. Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring.? My brothers and sisters, can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs.? Neither can a salt spring produce fresh water.’
James 5:12 ‘Above all, my brothers (& sisters), do not swear, not by heaven or by earth or by anything else. Let your “yes” be yes, and your “no” be no, or you will be condemned.’
In other words let your word be your word, based on your own honesty and integrity.
Only a few decades ago, many significant business transactions were agreed and sealed with each party giving their word and shaking hands on it. No forms, no contracts, no lawyers. Their word was the contract. The glue which held it all together was TRUST.
When you say “I will do it,” you are signing your name to a verbal contract and committing your reputation and character; which should be of the utmost importance to you.
1 Peter 3:10 ‘For, whoever would love life and see good days must keep their tongue from evil and their lips from deceitful speech.’
1 Peter 1:15-16 ‘Just as He who called you, is holy, so be holy in all you do, for it is written, “Be holy, because I am holy.”
We should not tell sexual or doubtful jokes, or any jokes at all which do not add quality and value to conversation.
The words we use in reference to ourselves should be carefully chosen, because if we speak negatively, or in a negative way of expressing the subject by way of saying what we do not want, the subject word is taken up by our subconscious mind which inexorably leads us to virtually unknowingly fulfil the subject of the negative phraseology, which produces the exact opposite outcome (result) to what we want. For example we should not say “I do not want to be fat” because the subject word of that statement is ‘fat’. We should say “I want to be slim,” of which the subject word is ‘slim.’ We should always say what we want, not what we do not want. In a similar way we should never say anything negative about ourselves, because in doing so we are once again giving the subconscious mind a subject to drive us unconsciously to fulfil. We should never say things such as: “I always miss out at the last minute,” or “I always make that mistake,” or “I am such an idiot,” because that is exactly what will continue to happen as a result of our speaking it into existence, and into our very own belief system, into our subconsciousness, and therefore it becomes our life reality. Such a person will then say “See, I was right, it has happened again,” not realizing that they have spoken that very thing or condition, into being.
A person should never say, for example, “I do not want to ever marry an alcoholic,” because the subconscious mind will lead them to fulfil the subject word of the sentence, which is ‘alcoholic.’ They should say “I want to marry someone who is a non-drinker or teetotaller.” The subject of which is ‘non-drinker or teetotaller.’ Once the subconscious mind is given - fed - a subject, it will inexorably (relentlessly) steer the person to end up with the reality of that subject, whether they wanted it or not. Their words have programmed their own destiny. The subconscious mind picks up the subject of the sentence, not the context of it.
What one says is not always easy to be mindful about, however we do need to be conscious of what we are saying and how we are saying it. So whenever possible, we should allow ourselves time, even just a few seconds, to think.
During a counselling course I did, we looked at a case of a woman who was suffering depression, who said to family and friends: “I would rather be overweight than depressed.” She ended up being depressed and overweight, because her subconscious picked up both subjects. Following counselling during which she remembered her often repeated words, she was guided to speak about becoming slim and happy, and that is exactly what she became. What a wonderful outcome.
Whether we like it or not, or believe it or not, we all live under the authority of words. The only choice we have is, which words we choose to live under, words of life, or words of death. We can determine the outcomes of so many things in our lives by the words we use and how we use them. We can speak positively or negatively; we can build others up or pull them down; we can use positive humour or negative humour. If one cannot think of a positive way to say something, it is better to not say anything at all.
Taming the tongue is closely related to patience and self-control, and can help you to avoid learning the hard way to stop feeling pressurised or under an obligation to give an immediate answer. With many decisions you need to draw on wisdom to realize that you need time to think. The well-known saying to ‘sleep on it,’ is usually a very good thing to do. The next day you can wake up to see the subject in a different light. If it is possible to delay a decision for several days, all that extra thinking time can allow you to see things quite differently, in a different perspective, and far more clearly, and to use your tongue with far greater wisdom to speak a considered opinion and decision.
In the same way that the old saying ‘Time heals everything,’ can also be expressed as ‘Time changes everything,’ we can say that ‘Words change everything.’
Through Jesus we have been redeemed from the curse of sin and death. So we live in faith and belief and use words accordingly, including reading the Bible regularly to feed and increase our faith and belief.
It is in giving that we receive; it is in pardoning that we are pardoned; it is in loving that we are loved; in every way treat others just as you would want to be treated.
All of this is summed up by: Do or say to others what you would like them to do or say to you.
If you find it hard to say ‘no’ to a request by anyone at all; just say: “I feel it is not wise for me to do this” or “It is not wise for me to make a decision at this time, because I don’t have peace about it,” or “I need to sleep on it, or think about it.” ______________________________________________________________________________
The power of GOD’s words goes beyond that of human influence.
Humans need to rely on materials which GOD has created, to produce energy and physical products. We can only create energy and products out of substances, which includes sunlight, gasses, and other invisible elements, which all originate from GOD’s creation.
GOD spoke creation into being out of nothing, which is proof that HIS Words are all powerful, and able to create energy and substance out of nothing.
The farewell greeting ‘Goodbye’ was derived from the original greeting: ‘GOD be with you.’ ______________________________________________________________________________
PRAYER: “Lord GOD I believe that Jesus died and rose again on behalf of humanity. I accept Him as the Messiah, and as My Saviour, redeemer, and Lord of my life. Lord make me an instrument of Your love and peace; where there is hatred let me sow love; where there is doubt let me sow faith; where there is despair let me sow hope; where there is darkness let me sow light; where there is sadness let me sow joy. Please grant me, that by consoling others, my compassion may grow; that by understanding others, my understanding may grow; and that by loving others, my capacity to love may grow.”